Founders letter - Surviving Winter & Triple Bonds
Hey Babes!
I hope you are well and Spring is welcoming you with some warmth.
For a lot of us, this Winter has been HARSH. Not just physically, I’ve spoken to so many people who have said this year started rocky. Conflict, challenges, curveballs left right and centre. Coupling that with the darker days, colder nights and lack of sun can be incredibly demotivating. Holding all of this in mind, I want to acknowledge that you survived it all! Spring is upon us and we have crossed into the days becoming longer day by day. I hope you can offer yourself some respite and rest in response to all you’ve carried this year.
(Content Warning: racial slur reference)
Triple Bond
Many of us witnessed the hurtful situation that took place at the BAFTA’s this season. There was an incident where the BBC broadcasted a tic said by Tourettes advocate: John Davidson. The tic happened as Michael B Jordan and Delroy Lindo came up to collect an award for Sinners - a film exploring Black creativity, spirituality and racism.
The part that was harmful was the tic was a racial slur. The BBC placed mics in areas that would pick up his tics and it was not edited out before being broadcasted. Mind you, Free Palestine was removed from an acceptance speech. It shows us all we need to know about their priorities and care towards both the Black community and the disabled community.
What I have found incredibly heartbreaking and telling is the triple bond our community is/was left in during situations like this. Where disability rights clashes with racial equality. Online there was an onslaught on both sides. People claiming that it is just a word, we should ‘get over ourselves’ and that we are being ableism if we express hurt or a want for reconciliation. Others claiming it was intentionally said and coincidental that the tic came at that specific time. It gave people a pass to silence our right to emotional safety as Black people by hiding behind disability activism. It also gave space for people to make unfair and ableist comments about disabled people by leaning into understandable hurt.
Both sides were on both extremes. There was very little space for nuance and two truths existing at the same time. We, folks who are both Black and disabled, are left in the middle. Defending and deflecting both sides.
Yes, it is hurtful and emotionally unsettling to hear that word that is filled with so much painful history at such a pivotal moment of joy and celebration for Black creatives.
Yes, it is true that tics are involuntarily and happen with no ill-intent.
The impact is true and so is the fact that the impact was not intended. A nuanced discussion around what an apology might mean, who it is for and the difference between apologising for the impact rather than apologising for existing could not be had.
The focus shifted to a war between protected characteristics rather than holding the BBC accountable and standing in solidarity with everyone who was impacted by their failure.
This situation reminded me that we as Black Women and gender non-confirming folk are often left in a triple bond. Holding and navigating our race, disability and gender. One does not dissolve into the other and sometimes they come at a clash leaving us stuck.
It did remind me to find faith and trust in open and honest dialogue. A lot of people online are keyboard warriors. They are not interested in genuine discussions and forget they are speaking to real human beings on the other side of their screen. Bringing the conversation into the real world helped me feel grounded and hopeful. There was a lot of noise online, but in real life, people are open and willing to lean into nuance. Those who aren’t I don’t have to remain in community with.
It was a reminder that we can curate our communities of safety, especially when the world is so loud with callousness. We can lean into care and compassion with those who hold space for all parts of who we are.
I hope you feel held and seen where you are; as you deserve.
I wish you well until we speak again!
Lots of love
Vivienne x
Support Jamaica - https://www.gofundme.com/f/CaribbeanHurricaneFund
Support Haiti - https://give.hopeforhaiti.com/campaign/739906/donate?c_src=hurricane-melissa
Free Haiti - https://hopeforhaiti.com/
Free Congo - Tiktok & link to the petition
Free Palestine - Thread of ways to support
Free Sudan - Thread of ways to support
Suggestions of ways to support numerous causes, including Hawaii, Lebanon & Yemen
Make it stand out
About Vivienne
Vivienne Isebor is a Creative Social Entrepreneur & Womanist, blending community activism, advocacy, psychology, and the arts to drive social change. She is the founder of ADHD Babes, the UK’s only community organisation dedicated to supporting Black women and non-binary people with ADHD, and a qualified Clinical Associate in Psychology from UCL. Beyond her advocacy and psychological work, Vivienne is a combined performing artist, incorporating storytelling, music, poetry, spoken word, and performance to create immersive, community-driven experiences.